Thumpin' week 14
Since college football is all but over (aside from those pesky Bowl games) we’re getting to crunch time in the NFL season, when the contenders separate themselves from the pretenders—or vice versa—and the playoff picture starts to shake out.
Many of this week’s games have playoff implications. Some feature teams trying to stay in the hunt while others try to lock down postseason berths or jockey for position in playoff seeding. This week I am going to try to breakdown the scenario that could result from each game should each playoff aspirant win. For games that feature teams that are already out of the playoff picture, or one’s that I deem not to have a virgin’s chance in Vegas to make it, I will quote a line from Chumbawumba’s 1997 smash hit “Tubthumping”.
Home teams in CAPS:
ATLANTA over Oakland – The Raiders are 4-8 and out of the playoffs for the second year in a row. The Falcons can clinch the NFC South Division and an automatic playoff berth with a win or tie, or with Tampa Bay and Carolina losses or ties.
MINNESOTA over Seattle – The Vikes are 7-5 and tied with the Green Bay Packers atop the NFC North. A win will keep them alive for a division title with one game left against the Pack on Christmas Eve. The ‘Hawks are 6-6 and tied with the Rams for first place in the NFC west, but after losing to the Rams twice this season need a win coupled with a Rams loss to regain control of their division.
NEW ENGLAND over Cincinnati – The Patriots can earn the AFC East title with a win and a New York Jets loss. The Patriots clinch a playoff berth with a win or tie, or a Baltimore loss or tie, Denver loss or tie, or Pittsburgh win or tie. The Bungles are 6-6 and therefore eliminated from their division race behind the 11-1 Pittsburgh Steelers. Cincy appear to need to run the table in order to make the playoffs for the first time since the Icky Shuffle.
Chicago over JACKSONVILLE – Okay…technically both da Bears and the Jags have an outside shot at the wild card…but I can’t resist: “He drinks a whisky drink. He drinks a vodka drink. He drinks a lager drink. He drinks a cider drink.”
BALTIMORE over N.Y. Giants – The Ravens, at 7-5, have all but given up hopes of winning the NFC North, but are front runners to gain a wild card birth if they can win 3 out of their next 4. The Giants are miraculously still in the running for an NFC wild card slot but will need to win out to adequately improve their 5-7 record.
Indianapolis over HOUSTON – The Colts can take the AFC South with a win, or a tie and a Jacksonville loss or tie. The Texans, at 5-7, are out of the AFC playoff picture.
BUFFALO over Cleveland – A late-season charge by the Bills has evened their record at 6-6, which leaves them in position to win out and make the playoffs in the AFC as a wild card should a couple of the teams in front of them (Baltimore, Denver, the Jets) stumble. Cleveland is in a tight race with the ‘Phins and the Niners for the #1 pick in the April draft.
DALLAS over New Orleans – “He sings the songs that remind him of the good times; He sings the songs that remind him of the betta times.”
GREEN BAY over Detroit - The Pack is 7-5 and tied with the Minnesota Vikes (whom they’ve beat once already) atop the NFC North. A win will keep them in line for a division title with one game left against the Vikes on Christmas Eve. The Lions are 5-7 and technically still alive for the NFC wild card should they win out.
N.Y. Jets over PITTSBURGH – The J-E-T-S’s can clinch a playoff spot with a win, and a Buffalo loss or tie, a Denver loss and a San Diego win or tie. The Jets can also clinch a playoff berth with a win and a Buffalo loss or tie, a Denver loss and a Baltimore win or tie. The Stillers can clinch the AFC North Division with a win or tie, or a Baltimore loss or tie. The Steelers also earn a playoff spot with a Denver loss or tie.
DENVER over Miami – Despite a crushing loss to the Chargers last week (for which the Mick still owes me money), the Broncs still control their own destiny to make the playoffs, though a division title may be out of reach now. With a 2-10 record, the ‘Phins have been out of the playoff hunt since October.
ARIZONA over San Francisco – “Pissin' the night away. Pissin' the night away. Pissin' the night away. Pissin' the night away.”
SAN DIEGO over Tampa Bay – The Chargers are 9-3 and hold a two-game division lead over the Broncs (the two teams split the season series). They can clinch the division with a win on Sunday and one more win in their last three. The Bucs are hanging onto their playoff hopes by a thread and must outlast the other six 5-7 teams—as well as the two 6-6 teams and the two 7-5 teams—to hope for playoff glory.
CAROLINA over St. Louis – The Panthers are another 5-7 team who, thanks to a four game winning streak after starting the season one for their first eight, are fighting for their playoff lives. St. Louis is only 6-6, but somehow control their own destiny for the playoffs thanks to a season sweep of the ‘Hawks and atrocious play down the stretch from the Cards and Niners. They need only win as many games as the ‘Hawks do and they’re in.
Philadelphia over WASHINGTON – The Iggles, who clinched the NFC East Division like three weeks ago, can earn a first-round bye with a win or tie Sunday night at Washington, or a Green Bay loss or tie, or an Atlanta win or tie.
Kansas City over TENNESSEE - “I get knocked down, but I get up again. You're neva gonna keep me down. I get knocked down, but I get up again. You're neva gonna keep me down!”
Last week: 9-7
Overall: 103-73 (58.3%)
Many of this week’s games have playoff implications. Some feature teams trying to stay in the hunt while others try to lock down postseason berths or jockey for position in playoff seeding. This week I am going to try to breakdown the scenario that could result from each game should each playoff aspirant win. For games that feature teams that are already out of the playoff picture, or one’s that I deem not to have a virgin’s chance in Vegas to make it, I will quote a line from Chumbawumba’s 1997 smash hit “Tubthumping”.
Home teams in CAPS:
ATLANTA over Oakland – The Raiders are 4-8 and out of the playoffs for the second year in a row. The Falcons can clinch the NFC South Division and an automatic playoff berth with a win or tie, or with Tampa Bay and Carolina losses or ties.
MINNESOTA over Seattle – The Vikes are 7-5 and tied with the Green Bay Packers atop the NFC North. A win will keep them alive for a division title with one game left against the Pack on Christmas Eve. The ‘Hawks are 6-6 and tied with the Rams for first place in the NFC west, but after losing to the Rams twice this season need a win coupled with a Rams loss to regain control of their division.
NEW ENGLAND over Cincinnati – The Patriots can earn the AFC East title with a win and a New York Jets loss. The Patriots clinch a playoff berth with a win or tie, or a Baltimore loss or tie, Denver loss or tie, or Pittsburgh win or tie. The Bungles are 6-6 and therefore eliminated from their division race behind the 11-1 Pittsburgh Steelers. Cincy appear to need to run the table in order to make the playoffs for the first time since the Icky Shuffle.
Chicago over JACKSONVILLE – Okay…technically both da Bears and the Jags have an outside shot at the wild card…but I can’t resist: “He drinks a whisky drink. He drinks a vodka drink. He drinks a lager drink. He drinks a cider drink.”
BALTIMORE over N.Y. Giants – The Ravens, at 7-5, have all but given up hopes of winning the NFC North, but are front runners to gain a wild card birth if they can win 3 out of their next 4. The Giants are miraculously still in the running for an NFC wild card slot but will need to win out to adequately improve their 5-7 record.
Indianapolis over HOUSTON – The Colts can take the AFC South with a win, or a tie and a Jacksonville loss or tie. The Texans, at 5-7, are out of the AFC playoff picture.
BUFFALO over Cleveland – A late-season charge by the Bills has evened their record at 6-6, which leaves them in position to win out and make the playoffs in the AFC as a wild card should a couple of the teams in front of them (Baltimore, Denver, the Jets) stumble. Cleveland is in a tight race with the ‘Phins and the Niners for the #1 pick in the April draft.
DALLAS over New Orleans – “He sings the songs that remind him of the good times; He sings the songs that remind him of the betta times.”
GREEN BAY over Detroit - The Pack is 7-5 and tied with the Minnesota Vikes (whom they’ve beat once already) atop the NFC North. A win will keep them in line for a division title with one game left against the Vikes on Christmas Eve. The Lions are 5-7 and technically still alive for the NFC wild card should they win out.
N.Y. Jets over PITTSBURGH – The J-E-T-S’s can clinch a playoff spot with a win, and a Buffalo loss or tie, a Denver loss and a San Diego win or tie. The Jets can also clinch a playoff berth with a win and a Buffalo loss or tie, a Denver loss and a Baltimore win or tie. The Stillers can clinch the AFC North Division with a win or tie, or a Baltimore loss or tie. The Steelers also earn a playoff spot with a Denver loss or tie.
DENVER over Miami – Despite a crushing loss to the Chargers last week (for which the Mick still owes me money), the Broncs still control their own destiny to make the playoffs, though a division title may be out of reach now. With a 2-10 record, the ‘Phins have been out of the playoff hunt since October.
ARIZONA over San Francisco – “Pissin' the night away. Pissin' the night away. Pissin' the night away. Pissin' the night away.”
SAN DIEGO over Tampa Bay – The Chargers are 9-3 and hold a two-game division lead over the Broncs (the two teams split the season series). They can clinch the division with a win on Sunday and one more win in their last three. The Bucs are hanging onto their playoff hopes by a thread and must outlast the other six 5-7 teams—as well as the two 6-6 teams and the two 7-5 teams—to hope for playoff glory.
CAROLINA over St. Louis – The Panthers are another 5-7 team who, thanks to a four game winning streak after starting the season one for their first eight, are fighting for their playoff lives. St. Louis is only 6-6, but somehow control their own destiny for the playoffs thanks to a season sweep of the ‘Hawks and atrocious play down the stretch from the Cards and Niners. They need only win as many games as the ‘Hawks do and they’re in.
Philadelphia over WASHINGTON – The Iggles, who clinched the NFC East Division like three weeks ago, can earn a first-round bye with a win or tie Sunday night at Washington, or a Green Bay loss or tie, or an Atlanta win or tie.
Kansas City over TENNESSEE - “I get knocked down, but I get up again. You're neva gonna keep me down. I get knocked down, but I get up again. You're neva gonna keep me down!”
Last week: 9-7
Overall: 103-73 (58.3%)
posted by bd @ 12/10/2004 05:15:00 PM
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