What’s in a name?

Great article from The Chronicle of Higher Education on unnecessarily wordy job titles, focused primarily on college and university staff (hence the title, methinks). The examples range from the sublime to the ubiquitous, from the borderline objectionable to the obscenely adjectival, and in each case makes me shake my head at the depths of ambiguity that our social institutions have sunk to. Blatant titular homogeny must be stopped before it takes over the world.

Granted this is a familiar rant (albeit only tangentially related to the topic of the article), and one possibly done to death in the nascent stages of political corre—oops! I mean “cultural sensitivity”—but one that is always worth the argument.

My issue lies not with the institutions themselves that make the changes, designating what used to be a janitor as a “custodian” or a fireman as a “firefighter”, as the decision to do so no doubt came from some amount of public outcry over the unjust wording the titles. The blame belongs to the outcryer, the individual or group or union that sees growth and respectability to be gained outwardly, though a change in professional cognomen, rather than inwardly, through a change in personal responsibility and accountability.

Is a person only defined by their label? Is a female member of the Senate so marginalized by being called a Congresswoman that it is necessary to refer to all Senators, regardless of gender, as Congresspeople (or is it Congresspersons)? Are garbagemen (or garbagepeople…or garbagepersons) so appalled at their station in society that they feel being labeled “waste management professionals” will immediately elevate them? Nothing’s changed! You can call them the Kings of Siam if you want; they’re still picking up trash on the side of the road and hanging off the side of a big smelly truck!

I believe that someday this insanity will end and we will return to a simpler time where sex and social class and professional title are not the definition of our existence. A time of both actors AND actresses, of policemen AND policewomen, of barbers AND barberellas. A time when babysitters (not child care specialists) and stewardesses (not flight attendants) and lunchladies (not food service professionals) are proud of the work they do and the label that society has seen fit to refer to them as.

In the meantime, I will continue my quest to become the best Community Prevention Coordinator that this community has ever seen.