Pickin’ and Grinnin’

So today’s been a little hectic with prepping for a trip to NoCal to see H’s mom, getting the boss outta town (gone to Europe and India until January—sweet lord hallelujah) and wading through the scads of hits this site has gotten over the past two days, all from a search query involving some permutation of “Terrell Owens TO clip Monday Night Football MNF Desperate Housewives Nicolette Nicky Sheridan video Mandingo promo racism towel Jungle Fever hubbub brouhaha”.

As such, and in hopes of breaking out of my 6-8/7-7/8-6 funk, this week’s picks will be short, sweet and hopefully correct…for a change. I will therefore predict each game based on the basis of the coolest sounding name on each team (no nicknames need apply).

Home team in CAPS:

MINNESOTA over Detroit –
Vikings: Butchie Wallace, RB
Lions: Damien Woody, OL

Denver over NEW ORLEANS –
Broncos: Monsanto Pope, DT
Saints: LeCharles Bentley, OL

TAMPA BAY over San Francisco –
Bucs: Shelton Quarles, LB
Niners: Joselio Hanson, CB

Arizona over CAROLINA –
Cards: Kyle van den Bosch, DE
Panthers: Cleveland Pinkney, DT

JACKSONVILLE over Tennessee –
Jags: Chris Fuamatu-Ma’afala, RB
Titans: Rocky Boiman, LB

BALTIMORE over Dallas –
Ravens: Darnell Dinkins, TE
Cowboys: Dat Nguyen, LB

St. Louis over BUFFALO –
Rams: Dusty McGrorty, RB
Bills: Takeo Spikes, LB

CHICAGO over Indianapolis –
Bears: R. W. McQuarters, CB
Colts: Tupe Peko, OL

Pittsburgh over CINCINNATI –
Steelers: Troy Polamalu, S
Bungles: T.J. Houshmandzadeh, WR

New York Jets over CLEVELAND –
Jets: Jerricho Cotchery, WR
Browns: Ebenezer Ekuban, DT

San Diego over OAKLAND –
Bolts: Quentin Jammer, CB
Raiders: Sebastian Janikowski, K

SEATTLE over Miami –
Hawks: Mack Strong, FB
Phins: Sage Rosenfels/A.J. Feeley, QB (tie)

Atlanta over NEW YORK GIANTS –
Falcons: Alge Crumpler, TE
G-men: Tiki Barber, RB

PHILADELPHIA over Washington –
Eagles: Reno Mahe, RB
Skins: Rock Cartwright, FB

Green Bay over HOUSTON –
Pack: Kabeer Gbaja-Biamila, DE
Texans: Demarcus Faggans, CB

New England over KANSAS CITY –
Pats: Randall Gay, CB
Chiefs: Priest Holmes, RB

Apologies, of course, to Anquan Boldin, Dave Zastudil, Dexter McCleon and Brandon Manumaleuna. Your class and dignity in the face of defeat will always be appreciated.

Last week: 8-6
Overall: 81-63 (56.3%)