Dear Reader,
Hopefully you stuck with me through my exhaustive religious rant yesterday. I’m not actually sure that I stuck with MYSELF, but if you’re still there, I appreciate your patience.
As you may have noticed, Nimmy* has undergone a few minor changes over the past 24 hours. The biggest change is the addition of a few small, hopefully unobtrusive advertisements for Google related products and the new Google search bar. The reason for these additions is twofold:
1. I am making a blanket statement on the rampant capitalization of the internet, even private online journals (or “blogs” if you will), once touted as the last safe haven of individuality; and
2. Show me the money.
So please, click away. Nothing bad will happen, I promise. No viruses, no pop ups, no bulk e-mails…but if you’re lookin’ for some info on Diabetes prevention or want to protect and restore marine life in Georgia, I just might be able to help you out.
And now, on to this weeks NFL picks (Home team in CAPS):
NEW ORLEANS over San Fran – The Saints looked pretty damn awful against the ‘Hawks last weekend, but then Seattle is a much tougher team on the road than they are at home. While the Saints have spent the week fretting about how Hurricane Ivan’s destructive possibilities, the Niners must have worried just as much about how former Hurricane Ken Dorsey will do in his first NFL start (Sorry, I couldn’t resist). The history of U of M QBs in the pros is not especially distinguished (“Hi, this is Gino Toretta …have you given any thought to your children’s future?) so I’m betting against Dorsey. Saints win a squeaker.
Washington over NEW YORK GIANTS – You may remember my impressions of Kurt Warner after the Giants’ first game loss last week. I can’t see it getting much better against a revitalized Redskin defense. This one will be ugly, just like Gibbs’ ‘Skins like it.
Denver over JACKSONVILLE – After an emotional come-from-behind victory over the Bills last weekend, the Jags are flying high coming into their home opener against the Broncos. Thanks to Jake Plummer’s Sandy Koufax impression (I mean Key-Rist, Snake! You’re a trained professional! You’ve been in the league for eight seasons! Take the effin’ sack!) against the Chiefs, The Snake will be curtailed in favor of Quentin Griffin and an always impressive Denver running game that will be good enough to beat the Jags. Denver wins big in Jax.
BALTIMORE over Pittsburgh – This one is tricky. The Ravens looked downright awful against the Browns last week, never challenging a weak Cleveland pass defense though the Browns showed a 4-4 front to stop Jamal Lewis throughout. Yes, Kyle Boller is that bad. The Steelers rolled early against the Raiders, and then held on for a win on the back of Jerome Bettis’ freaky fantasy line. Even still, the Ravens have a defense that can win games, and Steelers have an offense that can lose them. Edge to the Ravens.
St. Louis over ATLANTA – Over the past four or five years, the Rams have been absolutely dominating in domes, including their home stadium. Michael Vick has not proven that he can operate a West Coast offense effectively. Sure, the Falcons won last week, but it looked more like Burt Young running the WC than Steve Young. Ten yards rushing? Wherefore art thou, Michael Vick? Rams in a yawner.
DETROIT over Houston – Riding high after their first road win since the Clinton administration, the Lions head home to Ford Field to find a Texans team that found a way to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory last week against the Chargers. I’m not sure that the Lions have ever won two in a row in the Matt Millen era, but there’s a first for everything. Despite the loss of Charles Rogers (fantasy sigh), I’m going with Lions over Texans.
GREEN BAY over Chicago – The Pack is back, as is Mike McKenzie, their hero from last year’s playoff game against the ‘Hawks. The Bears are a much improved team, but Rex Grossman is really hurting without the departed Marty Booker at WR. Add to this the fact that Grossman is fucking horrible, and I’ve got a good feeling about the Pack this week.
Indy over TENNESSEE – The Colts won both games last season against the Titans, including a 29-27 squeaker at Tennessee. Over the past season plus, the Colts are 13-3 against any team but the Patriots. Tennessee didn’t need much to beat the ‘Phins last week, and that’s about all they gave. There is no way the Colts start the year 0-2. Looks like another wild season in the AFC South.
KC over Carolina – First, a moment of silence for your esteemed blogger, whose fantasy football team took a helluva hit this week with both the aforementioned Charles Rogers and the Panther’s RB Stephen Davis going down with injuries. That being the case, I think would have picked Carolina to lose to pretty much anyone this week. The fact that the Panthers’ lackluster offense (also minus deep threat Steve Smith) is up against the most formidable O in the league makes the decision even easier. KC in a blowout.
Seattle over TAMPA BAY – Did Brad Johnson age like ten years since the Bucs were in the Super Bowl? He looked downright archaic last week against the Skins. And he will not be getting any help from a depleted receiver core this week against another light-it-up offense. Making up for my idiocy of last week, I’m picking Seattle to win big.
Cleveland over DALLAS – Vinny Testaverde to Keyshawn Johnson is one of the most electrifying combinations in the NFL today. These two studs could be the key to Bill Parcells’ Jets’ chances of competing in an increasingly difficult AFC Ea…wait, what’s that? It’s what? They’re where!?! Okay, time to lay off the Quaaludes at work.
OAKLAND over Buffalo – Good news for Buffalo: Drew Bledsoe was only sacked once last week against the Jags. Bad news for Buffalo: It came on a 3rd-and-Goal from the 1 yard line in the 4th quarter, immediately preceding a chip shot field goal and an improbable Jax game winning drive. The Raiders actually showed some life against the Steelers last week, and I think if they actually give the young guys (Fargas, Whitted, Gabriel) a chance to play, they could do some things this year. Like beat Buffalo, for instance.
New England over ARIZONA – Attention New England viewers: if you see a group of Patriot fans in the stands in Tempe on Sunday and they appear to be a eentsy weentsy bit intoxicated and waving a gigantic Pats banner and screaming obscenities while the Cardinals honor the memory of fallen soldier Pat Tillman…I’ve never met those guys in my life.
New York Jets over SAN DIEGO – The Drew Brees Era in San Diego has officially begun. Again. For now. Anyone wanna take bets on how many it losses it takes for LaDanian Tomlinson to go from “I love San Diego, great city, I wanna spend my whole career here” to “Trade me now or I will take a shit at midfield next Sunday”. I got Week 9. Place your bets.
CINCINNATI over Miami – How bad are the Dolphins going to be this year? Let’s just say that coach Dave Wannstadt is thinking really long and hard about joining Ricky Williams on his “Goodwill Tour” of Bangkok, Amsterdam and Montreal.
Minnesota over PHILADELPHIA – I got nothing clever or witty or even insightful to say here. Randy Moss burns it up on Monday Night Football. He has something absurd like 10 TDs in 5 games. Daunte Culpepper threw for 5 TDs last week and Philly is starting two new corners in place of free agent all-pro losses Troy Vincent and Bobby Taylor. My head says Philly, but I just have a feeling about this one. Vikes win in a shootout.
Alright, got all that? Check in on Monday to see how much of an idiot I am. Fingers crossed.
b
*Nimmy is short for NMTE (Now More Than Ever)…get it? Sigh.
Hopefully you stuck with me through my exhaustive religious rant yesterday. I’m not actually sure that I stuck with MYSELF, but if you’re still there, I appreciate your patience.
As you may have noticed, Nimmy* has undergone a few minor changes over the past 24 hours. The biggest change is the addition of a few small, hopefully unobtrusive advertisements for Google related products and the new Google search bar. The reason for these additions is twofold:
1. I am making a blanket statement on the rampant capitalization of the internet, even private online journals (or “blogs” if you will), once touted as the last safe haven of individuality; and
2. Show me the money.
So please, click away. Nothing bad will happen, I promise. No viruses, no pop ups, no bulk e-mails…but if you’re lookin’ for some info on Diabetes prevention or want to protect and restore marine life in Georgia, I just might be able to help you out.
And now, on to this weeks NFL picks (Home team in CAPS):
NEW ORLEANS over San Fran – The Saints looked pretty damn awful against the ‘Hawks last weekend, but then Seattle is a much tougher team on the road than they are at home. While the Saints have spent the week fretting about how Hurricane Ivan’s destructive possibilities, the Niners must have worried just as much about how former Hurricane Ken Dorsey will do in his first NFL start (Sorry, I couldn’t resist). The history of U of M QBs in the pros is not especially distinguished (“Hi, this is Gino Toretta …have you given any thought to your children’s future?) so I’m betting against Dorsey. Saints win a squeaker.
Washington over NEW YORK GIANTS – You may remember my impressions of Kurt Warner after the Giants’ first game loss last week. I can’t see it getting much better against a revitalized Redskin defense. This one will be ugly, just like Gibbs’ ‘Skins like it.
Denver over JACKSONVILLE – After an emotional come-from-behind victory over the Bills last weekend, the Jags are flying high coming into their home opener against the Broncos. Thanks to Jake Plummer’s Sandy Koufax impression (I mean Key-Rist, Snake! You’re a trained professional! You’ve been in the league for eight seasons! Take the effin’ sack!) against the Chiefs, The Snake will be curtailed in favor of Quentin Griffin and an always impressive Denver running game that will be good enough to beat the Jags. Denver wins big in Jax.
BALTIMORE over Pittsburgh – This one is tricky. The Ravens looked downright awful against the Browns last week, never challenging a weak Cleveland pass defense though the Browns showed a 4-4 front to stop Jamal Lewis throughout. Yes, Kyle Boller is that bad. The Steelers rolled early against the Raiders, and then held on for a win on the back of Jerome Bettis’ freaky fantasy line. Even still, the Ravens have a defense that can win games, and Steelers have an offense that can lose them. Edge to the Ravens.
St. Louis over ATLANTA – Over the past four or five years, the Rams have been absolutely dominating in domes, including their home stadium. Michael Vick has not proven that he can operate a West Coast offense effectively. Sure, the Falcons won last week, but it looked more like Burt Young running the WC than Steve Young. Ten yards rushing? Wherefore art thou, Michael Vick? Rams in a yawner.
DETROIT over Houston – Riding high after their first road win since the Clinton administration, the Lions head home to Ford Field to find a Texans team that found a way to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory last week against the Chargers. I’m not sure that the Lions have ever won two in a row in the Matt Millen era, but there’s a first for everything. Despite the loss of Charles Rogers (fantasy sigh), I’m going with Lions over Texans.
GREEN BAY over Chicago – The Pack is back, as is Mike McKenzie, their hero from last year’s playoff game against the ‘Hawks. The Bears are a much improved team, but Rex Grossman is really hurting without the departed Marty Booker at WR. Add to this the fact that Grossman is fucking horrible, and I’ve got a good feeling about the Pack this week.
Indy over TENNESSEE – The Colts won both games last season against the Titans, including a 29-27 squeaker at Tennessee. Over the past season plus, the Colts are 13-3 against any team but the Patriots. Tennessee didn’t need much to beat the ‘Phins last week, and that’s about all they gave. There is no way the Colts start the year 0-2. Looks like another wild season in the AFC South.
KC over Carolina – First, a moment of silence for your esteemed blogger, whose fantasy football team took a helluva hit this week with both the aforementioned Charles Rogers and the Panther’s RB Stephen Davis going down with injuries. That being the case, I think would have picked Carolina to lose to pretty much anyone this week. The fact that the Panthers’ lackluster offense (also minus deep threat Steve Smith) is up against the most formidable O in the league makes the decision even easier. KC in a blowout.
Seattle over TAMPA BAY – Did Brad Johnson age like ten years since the Bucs were in the Super Bowl? He looked downright archaic last week against the Skins. And he will not be getting any help from a depleted receiver core this week against another light-it-up offense. Making up for my idiocy of last week, I’m picking Seattle to win big.
Cleveland over DALLAS – Vinny Testaverde to Keyshawn Johnson is one of the most electrifying combinations in the NFL today. These two studs could be the key to Bill Parcells’ Jets’ chances of competing in an increasingly difficult AFC Ea…wait, what’s that? It’s what? They’re where!?! Okay, time to lay off the Quaaludes at work.
OAKLAND over Buffalo – Good news for Buffalo: Drew Bledsoe was only sacked once last week against the Jags. Bad news for Buffalo: It came on a 3rd-and-Goal from the 1 yard line in the 4th quarter, immediately preceding a chip shot field goal and an improbable Jax game winning drive. The Raiders actually showed some life against the Steelers last week, and I think if they actually give the young guys (Fargas, Whitted, Gabriel) a chance to play, they could do some things this year. Like beat Buffalo, for instance.
New England over ARIZONA – Attention New England viewers: if you see a group of Patriot fans in the stands in Tempe on Sunday and they appear to be a eentsy weentsy bit intoxicated and waving a gigantic Pats banner and screaming obscenities while the Cardinals honor the memory of fallen soldier Pat Tillman…I’ve never met those guys in my life.
New York Jets over SAN DIEGO – The Drew Brees Era in San Diego has officially begun. Again. For now. Anyone wanna take bets on how many it losses it takes for LaDanian Tomlinson to go from “I love San Diego, great city, I wanna spend my whole career here” to “Trade me now or I will take a shit at midfield next Sunday”. I got Week 9. Place your bets.
CINCINNATI over Miami – How bad are the Dolphins going to be this year? Let’s just say that coach Dave Wannstadt is thinking really long and hard about joining Ricky Williams on his “Goodwill Tour” of Bangkok, Amsterdam and Montreal.
Minnesota over PHILADELPHIA – I got nothing clever or witty or even insightful to say here. Randy Moss burns it up on Monday Night Football. He has something absurd like 10 TDs in 5 games. Daunte Culpepper threw for 5 TDs last week and Philly is starting two new corners in place of free agent all-pro losses Troy Vincent and Bobby Taylor. My head says Philly, but I just have a feeling about this one. Vikes win in a shootout.
Alright, got all that? Check in on Monday to see how much of an idiot I am. Fingers crossed.
b
*Nimmy is short for NMTE (Now More Than Ever)…get it? Sigh.
posted by bd @ 9/17/2004 07:03:00 PM
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